Friday Humor – A Sign of the Times

Our new temporary reality.

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Literary Humor – Diary of a ‘Mad’ Indie Writer

March 20, 2020

Anatomy of a Senseless Conversation!

 An Indie Writer’s attempt at understanding human nature and failing badly.

 Acquaintance: “Hey, are you working on a new book?”

Me: “No, not at the moment.”

Acquaintance:  “Why not?”

Me: “Well, for multiple reasons. One, I don’t have any story ideas at the moment. Two, I think I might be suffering from a bit of writers block, and Three,  it’s hard to find the motivation to write when you’re books aren’t selling as well as you’d hoped they would.”

Acquaintance: “Hmm! Sorry to hear that. Do you think you’ll ever write another book?”

Me: “Honestly, I have no idea, but I sure hope so.”

Acquaintance: “I see.”

Me: “By the way, have you read any of my books?”

Acquaintance: “Me? Oh no, I’m not a reader. I don’t like reading books.” (Leaves room)

Me: Bang head against nearest wall.

 

 

 

 

Regards

‘Mad’ Indie Writer

“The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad.”  – Salvador Dali

 

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Literary Humor – Diary of a ‘Mad’ Indie Writer

March 13, 2020

Rumor has it!

I often find articles scattered around the internet about the demise of the eBook format. The traditional publishing experts would like us to believe that paper bound books are still king and that the eBook is simply a passing fad.

When I read statements like that, I laugh….ha, ha!

I’m not sure about other Indie Authors, but the bulk of my book sales/royalties come from eBook sales.

Readers want books, they want them now (instant gratification) and the want them at a reasonable price!  Ergo – eBooks are king!

Here’s my proof.

EBooks make up 78% of my book sales.

Paperbacks make up 8% of sales

Last, (but not least) 14% of my total royalties are from Kindle Edition Normalized Pages (KENP) read by customers who borrow my ebooks from Kindle Unlimited (KU) and the Kindle Owners’ Lending Library (KOLL).

In Conclusion

The only demise I see is the slow and steady demise of over-priced paperback & hardcover books. Does anyone actually pay full retail price for a hardcover book? 🙂

Regards

‘Mad’ Indie Writer

“The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad.”  – Salvador Dali

 

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Literary Humor – Diary of a ‘Mad’ Indie Writer

March 6, 2020

How to make a Fortune from Second Hand book sales. Wink! Wink!

I think I just figured out how to make a boat load of money without having to sell a large volume of books. All I have to do is remove all my books from the marketplace and allow second hand sales providers to sell my books on Amazon

For example, a while ago I took my first book, ‘A Reason To Kill’ off the market and lo and behold the paperback version is now being offered on Amazon for a mere (don’t laugh) $923.90. If you want to save a couple of bucks you can pick up a copy from another vendor for only $814.57.

Such a deal! Worth every penny, if I say so myself.

Are there any takers?

If you think I’m kidding……check it out for yourself.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01FGQ4MLU

I rub my hands together and let out a wicked laugh, “I’m gonna be rich, rich I tell you!”

Regards

‘Mad’ Indie Writer

“The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad.”  – Salvador Dali

 

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International Book Reviews have landed on Amazon.com

I don’t know why it took so long, but international book reviews are now (finally) showing up at Amazon.com.

For years I’ve had to search multiple Amazon websites around the world just to see if any of my non-American readers had left reviews of my books. Now I’ve noticed that reviews from Canada. the UK and Australia are visible at Amazon.com.  Bravo Amazon!

I’d like to send out a belated thank you to all the international readers who took the time to post reviews of my books on their regional Amazon websites. Your thoughts and opinions are greatly appreciated.

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Literary Humor – Diary of a ‘Mad’ Indie Writer

February 28, 2020

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

The Good

I’ve completed 3 new short stories for an upcoming book which I hope to release in November.

I’m also happy to report that 4 new book reviews were posted on Amazon in the first two months of this year. Thank you to folks who wrote those reviews.

I not sure why, but KENP reads are at their highest level for the months of January – February since I began tracking them back in 2016 (see graph below)

Kindle Edition Normalized Pages (KENP) are the number of pages read by Kindle users who borrow my eBooks from Kindle Unlimited (KU) and the Kindle Owners’ Lending Library (KOLL).

The Bad

Although I’ve completed 3 new short stories, I’m not quite satisfied with any of them. They are missing something, but I haven’t figured out what that something is, so I can’t send them to my editor just yet. (Ugh!)

Now for The Ugly

As a result of my decision not to lower my book prices to 0.99 during sales events this year, and my determination not to overspend on advertising, book sales are about 45% lower than they were last year at this same time. This was not unexpected, but it’s nevertheless disappointing.

Oh well,Carry on my wayward Son, there’ll be peace when you are done!’

Regards

‘Mad’ Indie Writer

“The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad.”  – Salvador Dali

 

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Ratings without Reviews

Amazon is now allowing buyers to rate the products they purchase without having to write a review. I’ve recently witnessed this in my own books ratings.

I understand why they did this because it now makes it easier and more likely for a buyer to leave a rating without having to deal with the review part of the equation.

Unfortunately, from this writers prospective this change may create the potential for more harm than good..

Yes, we all want more readers to rate our books, but without the written review we (and potential new readers) have no idea why the person rating the book loved it or hated it.

The pessimist in me thinks that this makes it easier for people to leave malicious one star ratings without having to provide any explanation for their rating.

On the other hand, the optimist in me hopes that it will lead to more (and perhaps higher) ratings because readers who were once intimidated by the thought of having to write a review, will be more likely to just rate a book.

I guess only time will tell whether this move turns out positive or negative results.

Let’s hope the optimist in me wins.

https://www.marketplacepulse.com/articles/amazon-replaces-reviews-with-ratings

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Literary Humor – Diary of a ‘Mad’ Indie Writer

February 14, 2020

Literary Consolation Prizes

I believe that I qualify for a number of these Consolation Prizes. Ha, ,Ha!

Regards

‘Mad’ Indie Writer

“The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad.”  – Salvador Dali

 

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Literary Humor – Diary of a ‘Mad’ Indie Writer

February 10, 2020

Sunday Morning Chess Match

I think I finally found someone I can beat at chess.

Darn it! I spoke to soon….she just checkmated me.  🙂

Regards

‘Mad’ Indie Writer

“The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad.”  – Salvador Dali

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Diary of A ‘Mad’ Indie Writer

February 7, 2020

I long time ago when I wore a younger man’s clothes, I loved playing Chess and I was pretty good at the game.

After many years of never touching a Chess piece, a friend of mine talked me into playing chess again. He said it would relax me by taking my mind away from the pressure and frustration of writing. He also mentioned that at my advanced age the game would keep my mind sharp and stimulated. Hmm! Not sure I like what he was implying.

 

Well, after several weeks of playing against the Chess App on my tablet at a low, beginner’s level, and having my ass kicked time after time, I reached an obvious conclusion. My ability at playing chess and at writing are very similar—I suck at both! Ha,Ha!

 

Needless to say, I’ll never be speaking to that friend again. LOL

 

Anyway, I would be remiss, if I didn’t mention that one good thing did come from the experience. It gave me a great new idea for a short story. The story is about two formerly close friends who decide to play a game of Chess to settle a dispute. The winner survives to live another day, the loser—well, I wouldn’t want to give away the ending.

 

Wish me luck! – ‘Mad’ Indie Writer

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